What can you say when you cannot say it?

Μοιάζουμε ερωτευμένοι, μαγικοί μαγεμένοι σαν φεγγάρι κομενοι μισό και μισό. Οτι και αν μας συμβαίνει, κάποιο σύμπαν το στέλνει και οι δυο συντονισμένοι στον ίδιο σταθμό, στον ίδιο σταθμό. Για πρώτη φορά αξίζει η φωτιά, αξίζει να καις αξίζει να θες. Για πρώτη φορά το νιώθω βαθιά για μένα είσαι εσύ και ας πούνε πολλοί πως ζούμε μια τρέλα Για πρώτη φορά. Άμα ερωτά νιώσεις, αγαπάς τις συμπτώσεις με καρδιά να ενώσεις μισό και μισό, μισό και μισό. Για πρώτη φορά αξίζει η φωτιά, αξίζει να καις αξίζει να θες. Για πρώτη φορά το νιώθω βαθιά για μένα είσαι εσύ και ας πούνε πολλοί πως ζούμε μια τρέλα Για πρώτη φορά... Για πρωτη φορα.. FOR THE FIRST TIME we seem in love, enchanted by magic fitting like moon halves, whatever happens to us comes from some universe and the two of us tuned to the same station for the first time, it’s worth all the passion(/fire) it’s worth burning, worth wanting, for the first time i feel it deep inside you’re made for me and let the crowd say that we live crazy life for the first time if you experienced love you would love the coincidences; use your heart to join one half with another Rules for happiness: Something to do someone to love, something to hope for Kant There are times that are not right. There are times when you want to shout what you feel but you can't. You can't because is not right, is not the place nor the time. As in a parallel world you find what is right but you can't touch it. You find in your life what you were looking for, what you longed for - or at least this is what you think it is, but you cannot tell. Living with the secret deep insde of you. How many of you live with that secret?

Long time missing here.

I finally recovered my password. Google tennds to be a little too cautios to the point that even the real you can’t do much. Life happened so much in the past few years. Some things changed; some not so much. I am still me just years older and few pounds heavier...but still ME. Sometimes I wonder where my sanity is...I find it but I keep losing it along the lines. Life has a way to come back laughing at you and make you feel stupid for thinking you can beat it. I have a beautiful view from a new place I have been working for the past three years. My dream home. Will continue....

“The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated.”

It's been a long time since I wrote here. Life takes over and the next thing you know you are too busy too drowned into your own miserable self. One issue has been on my mind more persistent than the rest of them of course. ANIMALS. How we treat them, how they treat us. What makes us better or worse than them. What gives us power over them? Why do we eat them? What makes it right for us to kill them? Why this world is a big killing farm machine and we think it's ok to do it? Why so much hate? We can learn so much from them if we only stop and look. They have so much to say. To tell us. To teach us to be human after all. And they do it without words. Sometimes the best things in life are wordless. So do the actions. Silent but oh so loud. Look into an animal's eyes today. If you don't feel anything your sorry ass on this earth is so fucking worthless. You should not even have the right to breathe. 'nuff said

We do not so much need the help of our friends as the confidence of their help in need." Epicur

"Friends show their love in times of trouble..."
-- Euripides (408 B.C.)

So...Friends huh?
What is with people and the need to USE a friend?
What is it with someone that always takes and when you need it the most they let you down?
What is it that when someone finds a different set of friends they tend to forget who was there for them in the first place?
Is it right to use someone and then dispose of that someone after you don't need the help anymore?

I guess either I am doing something wrong or I keep getting the boot from friends. I guess I am too eager to help. I guess it's in my nature to answer always my cell phone and be there for anyone who needs me. I guess I am meant to be used and then when my help is no longer needed, I get to be disposed of. Why do I keep doing it, I don't know. Why I keep being nice, I don't know.

There is one thing I need to learn: to trust less, to help less and be less than nice. I need to learn to say NO and say I DON’T KNOW. Maybe I will stop being used. I don't ask for help often; but when I ask, you better get ready. Because if you are less ready than when I was for you, I will cut you off from my life. I don't need part time friends. I need full time friends. You get what you offer. If that would be true, I should be getting more than I actually receive. Somehow there is no balance in the shitload you get for all the big loads of good you give.

I am tired of being there for everyone and nobody there for me. I am just tired of people. I am disappointed. I am not asking for much, I only ask to be considered in your plans without you having to ask for permission to do it.

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival." CS Lewis

A child, like your stomach, doesn't need all you can afford to give it. Clark Frank

So what if she never taught her daughter the value of the money? So what if she never learned that you can't keep buying stuff for your son while he doesn't care and loses them constantly? Everyone sees their children as their best. But their children see them as well. And if they think that their son or daughter will not learn from their behaviour, they are dead wrong.

So what if someone that has barely money to eat dreams of a vacation? Aren't they allowed to dream? Hey, the emptier the pockets the better the dream right? But why go into a debt you can't afford just to please your child? Where do we start doing too much to please the child and not teaching the child that enough is enough?
Children - saw it today, barely even 5 years old. Daddy bought an expensive toy for the red headed girl - 600$ for an iPad. Parents buy love from their children. Parents stop being parents and start being buddies with their children. They are tired of being parents. They don't want to be called "mom" or "dad". Really? I mean...you are not one, why should they even bother to call you that name right?

Where does respect from your kids come? did you ever wonder that just because you bought that expensive toy, or phone that they just don't need, they don't love you as a parent? They see you getting in debt to buy something you cannot afford because why not you are in the "please my kid" business. What they learn is that money come from a plastic card and not from hard work.

So, what did you do for your kid today? Teach him/her a lesson or give him/her anything they asked for? Before you screw your kid up and let him/her sleep thought their teen years like a bear, wake him/her now and teach them that life is all about making a sacrifice and standing up after a fall. Not everything is given to us. We actually have to work for it.

There is nothing like the razor sharp tongue of a good friend to cut through the lies we tell ourselves.

Well well...so here we go again. MIA for a few months.
I wonder why a friend will ask for your advice. Just to make sure he/she will go the exact opposite way? It's a sort of  sounding board that the echo comes back "distorted"? What is it that people come to you for an advice since they have already their minds made up? Why the lying? And why do I even bother answering those calls, really.
My first instinct when I see someone making a stupid move because they think with what they have between their legs (that applies for both sexes) is to tell them "stop!". Go back. Reassess.Rethink.
But no, I become the enemy because I am trying to point to the obvious...arghhhh...I need to stop myself from doing that.

A sad day

Today I woke up to sad news. My friend's mother died last night. She was a wonderful woman funny and witty, warm and compassionate. I will miss her and I will pray for her family to get over the pain easier.

Is funny how we get so attached to people that are not blood family and we get so disconnected by the ones who are. Sometimes strangers prove to be closer to us that our real family bonds. Sometimes we have people that are closer to us than a brother or a sister can be and they are just...people from the distance, but you feel them so close to your heart and you feel their happiness or their pain.
Sometimes life brings you back bitter-sweet memories and dealing with so many feelings at a time is overwhelming. People from our past surface at a given moment and turns our wold upside down. Is it that they are just meant to be to open the wounds all over again so we can regret the past or it has a deeper meaning  such - look up to the future. I am not sure at times what it means. I do believe that God puts in our path people that sometimes need a second chance or just brings in our way people that will change our life. Sometimes in good or even in better.

I am at a crossroad right now. I am trying to sort out my feelings form my past that happened to come back at me with a vengeance I might add.
We have one life to live; we have to keep going forward because that is what is meant, we have no "reverse" on life. But we can keep going and sometimes we pass those important people because we never had enough time to watch them pass by. Happiness happens when you let it be and when you hold your heart open. It is like a warm fuzzy blanket in the cold that covers you, but not in the entirety. There is always something that sneaks around like a draft of cold and keeps trying to take it away. We have to hold the happiness while we can and with both hands when it's there. Or the draft will take it away from us.

Life is short. There is no reason you should deny your happiness because you think that your sacrifice will be enough. Never go around and deny what you deserve because someone took your smile away. Smile and the world will smile back at you . Cry and no other than your best of bests will be next to you to hold your hand and comfort you.
Just live, take chances, try to be happy. Find what makes you happy open your heart and just do it. Don't let another day go by without asking yourself :what is my next dream to achieve? If you don't have any dreams you are so dead inside. Find one. And when you find your dreams coming true, you will find the greatest reward : happiness!